Might not survive otherwise

Might not survive otherwise. Those words pierced my heart today.

When my girl was first diagnosed with congenital scoliosis, I spent hours researching on the web. As a parent, I felt like knowledge was vital. I wanted to know all of the possibilities, all of the options, and really, I wanted to know that she was going to be OK and live a full life. I was searching for answers.

It’s been a while since I’ve went searching. Life has been busy and things have gone well. My girl has a VEPTR in her back which seemingly did the trick. She’s had three total surgeries since last January. I had it settled in my mind that we would have expansions every five months, probably install a new VEPTR in a couple of years. Everything was settled.

Until we had our checkup a couple of weeks ago. The short version is that the VEPTR isn’t really working any more. We need another solution. We were informed of the next possible step, which is called a Shilla. It’s relatively new, still considered experimental. I’ve been busy and haven’t really researched it much. Until today. And this is one thing I read.

“the Shilla procedure is being used on patients who might not be able to survive otherwise”.

Wow. Straight to my heart. I’ve never thought of my girl in that way. That she might not survive. Oh I’ve known the reality of her condition. Basically, her lung can be crushed if we did nothing. And I know that life can be a little tough if you have a crushed lung. But I’ve never thought for a moment that we wouldn’t come out on the other side of this, and all would be well.

I’m still working through it. I’m not a worrier. I’m a “let me ponder it, understand it, accept it and let’s move on with life” kind of gal. I have absolute faith in God and stand on our verse that we have claimed for my girl from the beginning. “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11

Meanwhile, I’m off to ponder. And understand. And accept. Then we’re moving on. We’ve got lots of fun to be had. Lots of laughter and funny moments to come our way. And on the other side of our curvy journey, we will be able to say that we survived.